CELEBRITY NEWS

Posted by Bossip Staff

FILL IN THE BLANK: Tyra Banks crowned Jaslene ‘America’s Next Top Model’ because________________.

Actors Courtney B. Vance, 47, and Angela Bassett, 48, take a spin on Cinderella’s Golden Carousel at the Magic Kingdom in Florida with their twins Bronwyn Golden and Slater Josiah, 15 months.

Photo by Gene Duncan for Startraks.

So I don’t know what caused more of a commotion today at Barnes & Noble. Was it when I had to practically scream at the (apparently hard of hearing) staffer,”No, I am not looking for Memoirs of a Super Freak, the autobiography of Rick James. I want to buy a copy of Freak Show by James St. James.” Or did the larger commotion come when at last I managed to find the book (in the Teen Fiction section no less), and yelled out for all in the store to hear, “If your son is light in his loafers, then this is the book you need to buy him.” Either way, I figured James might get a kick out of knowing that someone put on their personal freak show in the Barnes & Noble bookstore on the Upper East Side of Manhattan!

– AguynamedWayne

source 1, source 2

Cannes hasn’t really picked up yet from what I can tell. Yesterday Jerry Seinfeld donned a giant bee costume and floated over the crowd on pulleys to promote computer animated film Bee Movie, also starring Chris Rock. It is out in November, 2007.

The cast of Zodiac was reunited to promote their film, which was released about two months ago and features Jake Gyllenhaal as the notorious real-life serial killer. Chloe Sevigny and Mark Ruffalo also star. Sevigny wore quite a normal flattering dress to the premiere, although the outfit she donned for the photocall was typically fug.

Juliette Binoche promoted her film Le Voyage Du Ballon Rouge. The description on IMDB says “A little boy and his baby-sitter inhabit the same imaginary world: through their adventures they are followed by a strange red balloon.” Didn’t I see that movie already?

Bai Ling strutted in a bikini while wearing a long black cape and weird cranberry fur legwarmers to drum up interest in Shanghai Baby, a film about the sordid sex life of a novelist.

And Pamela Anderson put on her signature sneer pout at a photocall for Blonde and Blonder, her new comedy with Denise Richards. Richards was nowhere in site, and must have stayed away from Cannes now that the news broke that she’s no longer with Richie Sambora.

Thanks to WENN Photo for most of these images.

Anne Heche is Dulusional - Dlisted

Model Tries to Sue Lindsay Lohan - The Blemish

Britney’s “buddy” Returns to Rehab - A Socialite’s Life

Smile Frowns on Jessica Simpson - Celebrity Mound

Johnny Depp Values His Family - Cele|bitchy

Couldn’t Paris Hilton Hide all the Time? - Faded Youth

Looks like Backstreet Boy Nick Carter is trying to make over his image - with a United Nations gig. Carter will be helping raise awareness of threats to the survival of dolphins in the wild for the U.N. Environment Programme, the Convention on Migratory Species, and the Whale and Dolphin Conservation Society. “People like Bono, Angelina Jolie, and Nicole Kidman have inspired me to put my celebrity to good use,” Carter says. “I have the advantage of reaching multiple generations to make a difference… I am really excited, but also a little nervous about this much responsibility…it is an actual job. There are responsibilities and commitments that I must make to be the voice of dolphins, whales and conservation issues, and expectations are quite large.”
source

Important lessons we’ve learned from the past week of entertainment news: 1. Backstabbing affairs don’t always end with the fairytale wedding. 2. Tony Parker may want to consider getting a bridal muzzle for his beloved. 3. Sometimes stars are just asking to be the butt of jokes. 4. Paris Hilton was actually right: Stars Are Blind.

15 random thoughts, questions, and observations for the week.

1. It s official: Southern Methodist University will be building the George W. Bush Presidential Library, marking the first time an American college has dedicated a library to a functioning illiterate. I m sure they ll carry a wide array of pop-up books.

2. Aw, you re welcome, sweetie. Now stop blaming your mom for everything. I know it wasn t her idea for you to be Mrs. Kevin Federline, so what is she to blame for, really?

3. Oh, you have to love the British contribution to television sometimes, I think. Only a month since I got to watch my beloved Katie Price on Katie & Peter, and now MTV is apparently working on a show called The Totally Jodie Marsh: Who Will Take Her Up the Aisle? God I love British models. Jodie is going to audition suitors, and I totally want to be one of them. No, since you asked, I don t have any self-respect, and I d love to be married to a British model. I really, really want to take Jodie Marsh up the ass er, aisle, I meant.

4. Maxim released their list of the 100 Sexiest Women, and as usual it s totally useless. Lindsay Lohan at number one? Above ScarJo or, really, anyone for that matter? I was thinking about this idiocy, when I passed this picture of someone named K.D. Aubert on the cover of Smooth. Now, I don t know who K.D. Aubert is, but looking at her here on the cover, I d really like to. Can you believe that there are only six black women on the Maxim list? I m not crying racism or anything, but I d really like to see more black women represented in the current obsession over Hollywood s young women. Seriously, I d much rather see Sanaa Lathan, Gabrielle Union, K.D. Aubert, Melyssa Ford, and Meagan Good online more often than the newest thing Lindsay Lohan did that wasn t acting or, you know, something work-related.

5. And while we re on the subject of unsexy white chicks, could everyone please stop fawning all over the pictures of Jessica Alba in GQ? Seriously, I ve seen roadkill that turned me on more than these completely artless pictures of a too-skinny, dead-eyed, uncomfortable-looking, talentless ing nue who has outstayed her welcome.

6. A lot of people are upset that Bruce Willis s new girlfriend is 23 year-old Playmate Tamara Witmer. The reason? She s only 5 years older than his oldest daughter. I know everyone likes to run around saying that that sort of thing is sick, but seriously, don t you think being unable to mentally separate your daughter from every other young girl in the world is kind of sicker? Seriously, what are those people thinking about?

7. One of my all-time favorite movies is The Long Good Friday, a complex and gripping British crime thriller that balances a fierce intelligence with social commentary in its portrayal of a character who risks everything only to lose it all. So, of course, you can imagine how I feel that it s going to be remade by Paul W.S. Anderson, the director of such fine cinematic art as Mortal Kombat, Event Horizon, Soldier, Resident Evil, Alien vs. Predator, and the upcoming remake of Death Race 2000.

8. Don t be afraid; sucking their blood and eating their flesh is how he stays as youthful as he thinks he looks.

9. Congressman Tom Cole, head of the National Republican Congressional Committee, was asked if the Republican Party losing both the House and Senate in 2006 had anything to do with the fact that the Republican base (you know, the people who vote) were sick of the out-of-control government spending from a party that s known for conservatism. Oh, I don t think the problem was spending, he said. People who argue that we lost because we weren t true to our base, that s just wrong. Man, Republicans aren t even in touch with their own voters, anymore. Because according to every conservative analyst I ve looked at so far, he s dead wrong.

10. That s alright, Melinda Doolittle, you don t want to be the American Idol, anyway. They almost never have careers, unless they re white chicks from the south. Hell, Jennifer Hudson and Kimberly Locke didn t make it, either, and they re doing great. You don t need American Idol when you have what you have: charming personality and an endless talent. And you won t have to have that awful album full of Kara DioGuardi and Diane Warren songs that they always have to do, so there s a plus.

11. Boy, I have to hand it to Kellie Pickler. I think it s hilarious enough when women lie about having breast implants (must you be so insecure as to lie about it?), but My hair is shorter and I m 20 have to be, hands down, the stupidest, funniest lies I ve ever heard a woman use to claim they re real.

12. This is just embarrassing. Oh, Parasite, no one s coming to your aid. We all want to see you burn too much. I m getting marshmallows ready. Oh, and don t think whining your way down to 23 days for good behavior (already? those porno tapes she s going to make with the guards don t really qualify do they?) mean you ve won. There s a prison overcrowding problem. And a lot can happen to you in 23 days, Parasite.

13. Opie and Anthony are being suspended for a month for an offensive bit on their show. I can t tell you how much it bothers me. After the Don Imus firing, it seems like this sort of thing is going to happen more easily, and it makes me queasy. America seems to be on a kick about determining correct behavior and correct ways of thinking, and we can t do that. People have a right to be offended, but that doesn t mean they have a right to be accommodated at every second. Sorry, but it doesn t. I ve never heard Opie and Anthony, but I can t imagine that people who do listen to them were too surprised by the bit. Just because Al Sharpton gets pissy doesn t mean you have to do everything he says.

14. Bill Clinton has announced that his Energy Efficiency Building Retrofit Program, an initiative his foundation has been working on, has its financing and will be implemented in 16 major cities worldwide. There are going to be major environmental upgrades in those cities, including my sweet home Chicago, making state-owned buildings more energy efficient, which will both reduce carbon emissions and save money. Heating, cooling, and lighting systems will be replaced, roofs will be made white to deflect the heat from the sun, windows will be replaces, and sensors will control lights and air conditioning. At least five billion dollars has been pledged. Chicago has been doing things like this for the past six years, saving about $4 million annually. The guy s been out of office for nearly a decade, and he s still helping America. The president we have isn t even doing that, and he s actually in office.

15. Pope Benedict XVI visited Brazil last week. 60 years too late, the last Nazi finally escapes to South America.