
-I hear she’s coming in. The ladies are all a flutter. Carol’s even got a sharpie from the outside to get an autograph. Or maybe she’s going to stab her with it.
- Photographers are everywhere. Good thing I got that new tattoo.
- FYI, lunch today is beef burgundy with cheese sauce and tater-tots. Special treatment already.
- Roz is pacing again. Paris must be close.
- Here she comes. I wonder who’s gonna’ be her bunkmate. I hope it’s Nadine. Paris will get lost in there if you get my drift.
- OMG! I see Guliana DiPandi from the window! And Mary Hart! They are definitely going on my ’stalk-list’ once I get out. FOXXXXY!
- I see her! Taller than I thought! Great hair. Full make up. A bit shiny. I’ll have to tell her that Roz can get her some blotting papers for a price.
- She’s coming this way.
- OMG! They put her in with Roz! Paris is crying. Roz just cracked her knuckles. oh this is good drama.
- The guard just gave her clean sheets? She gets NEW sheets?? That is unfair.
-Oh wait, never mind. Roz just took the sheets and made a KKK outfit out of them. Now she’s making Paris put it on.
- Jesus Christ she smells like that perfume you get free when you buy a Cabbage Patch Kid.
- Oh no, Roz is making her recite B’rer Rabbit. Somethin’ about a Tar baby.
- OMG I’m so embarrassed. i just yelled “Hi Paris!” and she smiled and waved at me. OMG! And of course I look fat today, too.
- Oh no. Nadine just threw a tampon into Paris’ cell. Now Paris is crying again. And Roz is telling nadine she’s gonna cut her for steppin’ to her bitch. I hope Starvos doesn’t get made that paris is already dating again.
- Lunch time! I’ll be back.
-Ok I’m back. She didn’t eat ANYTHING. And it was beef burgundy!?!? Man, if beef burgundy don’t impress you I don’t know what will. She probably gets taken out to the Olive Garden every night.
- Roz just killed Nadine.
- Paris is still crying. God she’s a wimp. Somebody just got stabbed, okay. Get OVER it. Man, rich people totally don’t know how to deal with life.
- SHOWERTIME!!!! I’ll be back.
- Ok. I’m back. Well, THAT was not pretty. Looked like fifteen Hostess cupcakes fighting for a french fry.
- Lights out. She’s crying again. JESUS.
-She stopped now. And now Roz is moaning. Oh lord. This is horrible. Roz is totally going to get an STD.
-